Wired / Tired / Expired, February 2014 edition

[Riga seems to be W class]

So, here’s the February edition of my Wired / Tired / Expired jargon watch overviews:

WIRED	TIRED	EXPIRED
Your own Jura	Babychino at Starbucks	Nespresso (and ~ shops) – or – Latte macchiato (tie)
(Since this blog is personal…)	Too wannabe hipster	George is getting really old, too
Mainstream	Hipster	Hip, New, or whatever
Since, you know, it’s the hipsters’ derogatory phrase for anything non-hipster that you can spread around anywhere like a cat spraying.	Is like (being) a lady: If you have to talk about it, you aren’t one.	You were young in some past millennium, maybe.
Fisker Karma	Tesla S	Prius
Just look at it! but I’m holding out for	The sheer exclusivity of it drops just a little too much	Mehhh. Also, see this infographic
Meanwhile…	Doge speak and starparodies	Rickrolling
… anywhere where some give no […] as here and here or even here.	Much nonsense. So annoy. Very copy.	Only if done really right.
Negging socmed	Competing socmed	Blue ocean (pretense) socmed
The way to go; invite to be bought out i.e. sell out.	Harharhar, just give it a try. The new what, you are?	Oh, and you think not everything has been invented yet?
Business suits (with or without tie; as long as the shirt is classy in itself not plain white no-iron (horror))	Too open shirts and thinny V-neck sweaters with no shirt under them	Business shirts with no undershirt
Classy will always be classy, will NOT go out of style	Petty pauvre posturing, with your breast hair not having recovered from the previous fad stupidity	Ewww!
Wearable tech (Glass, via Toq and Gear, to Google lenses)	Layar	Hey, I have this new phablet and I’m too stupid to understand I’m a dork for showing off!
They’re just hot, still.	It’s getting embedded, but the idea of ambient intelligence will certainly integrate with the Wired equipment. That it’ll be invisible, isn’t bad. Akamai is doing quite fine without anyone knowing…	Obnoxiousness sometimes is hard to ignore though we’ll try very hard
Gamification	Risk-based control / security	Totalitarian SOx control
So Wired it’s not figured out yet how this will change businesses throughout.	Mehhh, you cannot have progressed any further than the newspeak as no-one has, yet. And the idea is half-baked on many sides so may never work without much, (too) much compromise.	Only interesting for drones very below the ‘intelligent’ robot level. Stupid’s Delight. See Compliabullies and many posts before and after that.

OK, any suggestions for next month’s edition ..?